Creep-magnet

That's me. Like moths to a flame, I swear - every time I turn around there's some nasty creepshow drooling over me. I have the absolute worst luck when it comes to men.

The ones I fall for either:

A) Have a shit ton of issues (i.e. head cases)
B) Carry enough luggage to fill the belly of a 747
C) Want something, but don't want it all

The ones that want me are either:

A) Too young, too immature or a careful combination of both
B) Dirty white trash losers with a tattoo fetish
C) Just flat out boring.

If it's not some skeezy truck driver at work, it's something like what happened tonight.

I dropped in to Wal-Mart earlier to pick up my prescription. Whenever I have to make a trip to the cesspool that is Wal-Mart, I'm in there for 10 minutes TOPS. With as much haste as humanly possible, I returned to my vehicle. While buckling my seatbelt I noticed a piece of paper under my windshield - couldn't be a ticket, too small to be a flyer...

So I stuck my hand out of the window, popped the wipers on and after snatching up the mysterious paper...



I began to laugh uncontrollably.

The first thing that popped in my head (after noticing his awful grammar) was "Doesn't this guy know we have the internet for stalking and all other creep-tastic endeavors?" I almost wanted to give the guy credit for being so old school in all of his weird/lurkish behavior. It's sort of... purist in a way.

However, his poor grammar wasn't the only factor working against him. The note was scribbled on the back of a McDonald's receipt. Poor grammar + shitty diet + bad execution = DOES HE SERIOUSLY EXPECT SOMEONE TO CALL HIM WHEN HE DOES THIS SHIT?!



Even more weird? The McDonald's at which he purchased that meal? On 9 mile rd in Eastpointe - directly across the street from the home of one of my ex boyfriends.

The whole thing makes me laugh... and cringe... and place palm to forehead, wondering "Why me?"