One of my favorite hashtags to use on Twitter is #livingwithinjury. In fact, one of the biggest reasons I decided to make strides toward becoming ACE certified is to be able to share my story with others who may be battling against some seemingly-impossible hurdles. The battle of mine that has been known to most is the injury I sustained a little over a year ago - an acute rupture of my L4/L5 - a special case, as it ruptured into my spinal cord rather than to the side as most disc ruptures usually do. It has been a long road in these short 14 months - many nights spent silently crying myself to sleep from a pain and discomfort from which no position could yield relief. Yes, I admit that a large reason why the road has been so challenging is because I refuse to take pain medication - but trust me, I'd rather feel the *true* situation than numb it, disregard it, and forget about what it takes to correct it. Couple this physical pain with the stress of beginning my graduate/professional career and a long, drawn-out breakup and you have the potential for disaster. I look back and realize how many times I could've lost control - how many times I could've given up.
And while the life-long fragility of my spine is the most difficult challenge I face as someone with a passion for personal fitness, it is not the only one I've had to rise above.
I was born with a mild form of hip dysplasia. While this has not been too big of a deal in my everyday life, it consistently poses challenges to my fitness. Today, I found myself lying on the mat at the gym with the intention of stretching, instead pondering how the inescapable/unchangeable grand design of my body throws a wrench in my ability to execute (flawlessly) certain maneuvers. Instead of accepting it, I have always battled against it. I have refused to succumb to some form of biological determinism - to accept the notion that somehow I was never meant to achieve peak physical ability. Also - for most people, these small details do not matter - after all, they didn't matter to me until recently.
I stand at 5'8" tall and my legs are 28 inches long. To give you a better visual, my younger sister and I have the same leg length - she stands 5'1" tall. Legs as short as mine supporting a torso as long as mine have made my legs both notoriously strong and vulnerable at the same time. Dysplasia also causes the legs to bend slightly inward at the knee joint - in the most basic visual, the femur and the tibia/fibula are maligned at the patella. Ok, perhaps that wasn't too basic - but suffice to say, this causes one to battle their own personal geography. For me, personally, there are several exercises that I struggle with, not due to being out of shape, but due to fighting to keep my legs/feet in a position that elicits the proper bodily response - the position that respects the integrity of the kinetic chain.
The moral of the story has always been and will always be - keep fighting. There are times when my trainer will point to the "fire" that I have, the passion and stubborn determination that will keep me repeating an exercise over and over again for days on end until I get it right - until I train my body to respect the kinetic chain that I wasn't born with.
And whenever I feel sad about the pain or the difficulty, I think about how much worse things could be. I think about how my hard work has paid off despite the fact that it will always take me longer than others to reach certain goals. Therefore, through all of my experiences I hope to encourage others to realize that their potential goes farther than what the body attempts to convince them that they can't do. Perhaps there are exceptions to the rule, but there are always varying degrees of defiance. :)
I didn't ask to be born with dysplasia, but if I choose to let it dictate my life - I certainly will have asked for the feeling of failure that comes along with it.
Never let anyone, or anything convince you that you're not worth it or that it's not possible. Whatever "it" is - make "it" happen!
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